Now playing: Gangsta Fear | Santi
*unleashing my alte doppelganger and bursting some slow whines*
Happy New month! So I’ve been feeling very upbeat after my last post where I was opening up more about the toxic relationship. If you haven’t seen it yet, click here. I also left a little lesson there, who knows you might learn a thing or two from my mistakes. In the spirit of sharing, I’d be dishing out tips on how to get over a breakup. These are ways I know I tried and they worked for me even if there were failures here and there. It’s the season of love so I hope this helps you get over that heartbreak that feels like it’s going to kill you now. Btw, I’m super pumped and nervous about a shoot I’m planning with one of your favorite bloggers. Trust me to unleash some awkward poses on shoot day *tears*
PS: This is a lengthy post because I’m giving detailed descriptions to everything. Bear with me please.
Anyway, let’s get to the tips for the day (while you feed your eyes on my current favorite outdoor decor pins on pinterest);
STEP 1: Own up!
The very first step to getting over a breakup is to own up to the fact that it’s over and done with. There’s no need thinking he/she is going to realize what they lost and come back crawling because the sad truth is that most of the time they don’t and even if they do it’s always too late. Stop checking your phone for that “I miss you text” or waiting for that mysterious call at midnight where they’d say “babe, I want you back” because you’d only keep hurting yourself more when that doesn’t happen. Quit asking their friends or relatives if they miss you or ever talk about you. Own up sweetie, that ship has sailed.
STEP 2: Delete, BLOCK, report.
This has to be my all time favorite. Even my friends keep saying “e no dey hard you to block person“. I really cannot tolerate any form of negative energy and if I know something isn’t adding value or keeps draining my energy then I’m absolutely done with it. You should try to adopt this same energy too because it helps. Delete their number(s) and unfollow them on social media (that’s if you feel you can’t block them. If after doing that they keep calling or trying to message you, please dear block them. If your ex is the crazy type to create new social media accounts to stalk you or message you, report them (but what kind of psychopath were you dating though?) This step is very essential because you have to get rid of all negative vibes and anything that reminds you of them. Yes, it’s that deep.
Note: Blocking them can be done for as long as you please. It could just be for a specific time frame where you need to clear your head and purge yourself of them or it could be forever.
STEP 3: Throw everything out.
You know how they flooded your phone with pictures of them? Well delete those pictures. Those texts you’re constantly scrolling through and thinking about the “good” times, delete them. It’s like taking the trash out of your life. Out with the old and in with the new. Those shirts you took from them, face caps, earphones, even playlists they created for you, throw them out. Trash them and don’t look back. There’s really no need hoarding things that would make you think about them and ruin your mood on a daily basis. Please dear, throw everything out.
STEP 4: Cry but no sad songs
I know listening to sad songs and crying about your situation after a break up seems like the perfect thing to do at the time but don’t do it. Quit listening to sad songs you think relate to your situation because it will only make you feel worse about yourself. It’s okay to cry it all out. Scream if you have to but get it out of your system. It’s advisable to sulk or cry about it. You can try suppressing those feelings but you’d still have to confront them one day and you may break down. So cry but wipe those tears and gather the strength to move on.
STEP 5: Time for a pep talk
After successfully completing Step 1 to 4, it’s time for some pep talk. I keep saying this, “Your greatest cheerleader is yourself”. No one would push you to accomplish goals the way you’d push yourself. So it’s time to talk yourself out of it. Pick up a mirror if you have to. Speak positive things to yourself and take out all that bad energy. Talk to your maker. Literally lay all your feelings down and let Him know. He’s always there to listen and comfort you(not trying to preach or anything, just truths). You can also talk to that best friend of yours. There’s no sadness a little hyping can’t cure, or maybe a lot of hyping if your best friend is as extra as mine.
STEP 6: Do what makes you happy
As cliche as this may sound, it’s the absolute truth. If you find joy splurging on clothes/gadgets or whatever, do it. If you find pleasure dancing, create a dance routine. If you like fashion, then take a look at your favorite fashion blogger’s Instagram and find outfit inspirations (make sure to tag them if you’re recreating looks). Do whatever makes you absolutely happy. Travel the world if your bank account isn’t crying like mine. Go out there and flourish. Make sure you find genuine happiness because that’s the mistake many often make.
STEP 7: Build a better you
Last and my favorite after Step 2, be that person you’ve always wanted to be. Relationships bring out the best and worst in people. You uncover a part of you that you probably never knew existed. Learn from whatever mistakes you’ve made and make a conscious effort to do better. Write those career goals down and nail them. Create that bucket list you’ve always wanted to and smash everything on it. Keep adding value and skills to yourself on a regular basis. Improve on yourself, a relationship doesn’t define you.
Okay, these are the few tips I have on how to get over a break up and I hope they help you. Send me a DM if you’ve tried these steps and they worked for you, or if you’re having any troubles.
Note: I only shared steps that I’ve applied and I know worked for me. Feel free to try out other ways to get over a breakup if these tips don’t seem to help. You can share more steps in the comment section in case I’ve missed any.
All pictures gotten from pinterest.